Wednesday, July 12, 2006

The Word Wars, Part Two

[continued from y’day’s post which described some of the background for the Word Wars]

As I wrote y’day, this essay is attributed to Elmer Eggplant and probably was found during the compilation of the 21st Edition of the Absolute Truth. Note how his convoluted logic explodes into florid prose which he apparently thinks is poetic.

The use of religious symbols and texts to justify acts and policies immoral, evil and obscene intensified the effects of the Word Wars. They were in fact used consciously as a strategic weapon in these conflicts. Through such abuse, not only were the meanings of these symbols corrupted, they were infused with meanings at odds with the visions and insights which had given originally imbued these symbols with significance.

After the sudden and unexpected collapse of the evil empire of the Union of Slovenly Seedy Republics (or USSR, for short), it became a cliché (repeated again and again in what was called “the news”) that the Arrogant State was now the sole remaining hyper-power on their (unfortunate) planet. It was not only apparent but was demonstrated again and again that her invincible military might could, at will – or whim – crush any and everything. There was nothing which could not be ground to dust under the iron heel of Arrogance.

Toward the end of his career, Ronald Rexona was known to simply spin a globe , stop it with his finger and grunt to his military commanders, “Zap-em, baby!”. Within hours, Jovian thunderbolts would rain down upon the spot where his finger had come to rest, obliterating the straw-thatched mud hamlets of “terrorists” or destroying aspirin factories in some “rogue state”...

Entrusted with the absolute power of a might such as their poor world had never known or seen, Ronald Rexona repeatedly exclaimed that it felt like “having the Finger of God’s Justice in my hand!”

The obscenity lay in the fact that, even as the bombs fell and fireballs roiled into darkening skies, both he and other holes would speak of serving and fulfilling the “Word of the Holy Idaho”, that in fact they were not only defending but spreading “Peace and Freedom” to the War Zones as a “Gift from God”.

That they could speak and act in such deluded fashion was, in itself, also a result of the Word Wars. The Wars had enervated if not completely eradicated their sense of conscience. This left their mentality most susceptible to malignant and viral illusion. In fact, they succumbed to the Great Illusion – i.e., that Illusion is Truth. They were often know to brag, “We make the reality, all you suckers can do is live in it!”

It’s hard to think of them as victims because what blinded their spirit in this manner was that, when you get down to the nitty-gritty, they simply did not love the truth.

The casual observer may well find this surprising because so many Arrogant citizens continually prattled on about Truth. It was quite common to hear from their lips ejaculatory phrases such as “The Holy Idaho is the Living Truth!” and “Know the Truth!” -- by which they meant accept the Holy Idaho your personal Spud and thereby ensure Eternal Bliss in "His Holy Colander in the Sky".

However, the nitty-gritty of Reality was far too inconvenient and unsettling for them to embrace. The simple fact is that, when it all comes down to dust, Reality demands that one take actual responsibility for what one does – otherwise, salvation is a silly pipe-dream.

Therefore, the natural thirst for sacred knowledge was perverted in them. Instead of truth, they satisfied themselves with insinuating lies, educated ignorance, criminal acquiescence to wrongs and plain indifference to the sufferings of others – in short: they worshipped the “Grand Illusion of the Pious Piss Ant”.

We must not forget to mention the key role played by The Bankers of Illusion in the Word Wars. It was they who filled the public mind with garbage in exchange for the purest gold. Although the ordinary citizen of Arrogance had more leisure than any people in the troubled history of that troubled planet, they did not enjoy the wonders of creation unfolding before them. Instead they spent their free time in a empty ways, watching hours on end of poison dreams emanating from the obsequious glowing screens.

They piled up rows and rows of concrete bricks, and made them into walls many meters thick. They erected miles and miles of chain-link fence, electronic and high-tech defense. Then, inside their “Fortress of Arrogance”, safe and bathed in luxury, they imagined they could sit back on their soft cushions and suck the world dry of resources.

If the strange ships of the Alien Veggies had not appeared in the skies of their earth, it is hard to see how sentient life would have continued to exist upon their planet.

But, that is another and far happier story.

-- Elmer Eggplant

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